This is Part 2 of my Compassion blog posts. In Part 1, I shared what it feels like to offer yourself compassion. When you are able to offer yourself compassion, you find yourself feeling at peace and in acceptance of what is currently happening. So, the next question is how do you offer yourself that compassion? Sometimes telling yourself to cut yourself some slack just doesn’t seem to take the stress level down. In Part 2, I’m going to share a technique that has made a significant difference in my life: Voice Dialogue.
We have all heard the word compassion, but do you know how to offer it to yourself?
Merriam-Webster defines compassion as: “a feeling of wanting to help someone who is sick, hungry, in trouble, etc.” Okay, so it is more familiar when it comes to others, but what if we took a moment to offer it to ourselves? (screech…..What??? Wouldn’t that be selfish????)
Well, talking about “selfishness” is a whole other blog post (or 10). But, let’s let go of the culture-induced use of the word selfish, and really just let ourselves be front and center here. Remember what they say during the emergency directions on a flight: ”put the oxygen mask on yourself FIRST, then your child.” Why? Because if you are oxygen-deprived, you can’t help someone else (wait, no one thinks THAT is selfish!!).
Many of us call ourselves a perfectionist. If you’re one of these people, you know all too well the inner perfectionist can be a little domineering sometimes. Yet, what you might not know is that you don’t have to be victim to it. Your inner perfectionist can be managed effectively by practicing being aware of it, knowing it is not you and getting support from others when you can’t seem to separate from it.
You don’t have to suffer through the rest of your life by letting your inner perfectionist run the show.
What does the perfectionist sound like?
Do you hear yourself saying “I should…” a lot?
I listen to people and note how many times I hear “I should…” which makes me pause. What is this “I should”-ing about?
Perhaps it means, “I am supposed to be doing such and such, but I don’t really want to.”
What if you changed the word “should” to “want”?
Andrea helps clients declutter and get organized in a sustainable way that works long-term for them. Andrea also coaches private clients on career changes and personal development, helping them create a fulfilling, happy and exciting life. In her free time, Andrea enjoys cross-country skiing, reading and road cycling.