I made a comment to a friend the other day:  “I would love to be a wealthy hippie.” I thought being a wealthy hippie would take all my worries away--I would not HAVE to work, worry about money, or pay bills.  All my anxieties about money would disappear.

But, is this really true?  I have never been a wealthy hippie, so I can’t truly go from specific experience, but I've had times in my life where I had plenty of money and times where I haven't.  Yet, in both places, I worried about money--I would worry when it was going to show up and/or when it was going to disappear forever. It doesn’t matter how little or much money I have--I worry about it running out.  I may think being a wealthy hippie will allow me to be worry-free, but it's not really true.

When you look externally for things to be a certain way, you probably will never find happiness, even if things turn out how you want.  Happiness can only be found within us, as it is a state of being--a state of acceptance--with whatever is happening or not happening externally.

Studies have shown lottery winners end up being at a similar state or level of happiness as they were BEFORE they won the money.  This tells us money does not automatically guarantee happiness. If we have issues or challenges we don’t like before the wealth, they may change form, but will still appear after we have money.

When I think back to my wealthy hippie comment, what I am really looking for is peace and freedom. I think money will automatically make this happen. However, instead of focusing on the money or lack thereof, my focus should be on creating peace and freedom in my life, moment by moment.

My intention every day (and moment) is to create space for peace and freedom. It takes the pressure off from worrying about money.  This does not mean I’m not making an effort to ‘make a living’, but I let go of the worry of where the money is going to come from.  It's a moment-to-moment practice sometimes!

Even with my intention, I do get buried underneath the money worries. Coaching has served me well here, time and time again, to bridge the gap between where I am (worrisome, fear-oriented) to where I want to be:  experiencing peace and freedom.  In the end, the mind thinks worrying is productive, but it really isn't.  The key: find the space within you that creates the experience you want to have in the moment and bring it forward.

All of the points above do not mean gaining wealth is a bad thing.  It’s more about determining the true reason you seek wealth in the first place. Is it to have security, peace, or freedom?  Since money does not automatically provide these, in what ways can you create it now in this moment? Peace and freedom can be found at any moment, whether you are a rich hippie, a poor hippie, or a middle-of-the-road hippie. Peace and freedom are much more important to me than the drive for wealth.  Not sure what you are really looking for?  Check out my values page for help.

Do you find yourself angry or frustrated by what someone does or says to you?  Does it make you so angry you find yourself thinking about it constantly?  Do you wish it never happened, because then you wouldn't have to feel this way? Do you end up analyzing the occurrence over and over again?  

We have all been there--it's no fun.  When an event triggers us and we get upset, our typical M.O. is to resist the feelings or try to avoid them by distraction.  It's pain--and we don't want to feel it.  Instead, we blame the other person/event for causing it.  

"The Untethered Soul" written by Michael Singer, offers a simple, but effective solution. Oprah was so taken by this book, she featured Mr. Singer on her network (and that is how I discovered it).

When it comes to achieving significant goals, there are periods where the going gets tough.  For some of us, forward action ceases during this time. 

When we let the logical mind attempt to solve the problem, we limit our options without even knowing it. In this place of stuck-ness, the mind is not able to see every solution.  The mind can only see what's happening directly in front of it, and not the bigger picture.

• Over-analyzation:  Your mind is spinning/whirling while attempting to solve the problem
  
• Stress: You feel tired, low-energy and/or anxious from all the mind chatter
  
• Hopelessness--"Will I ever figure this out?"
  
• Regret--"If I hadn't embarked on this path, I wouldn't be feeling this way."
  
• Self-judgement--"Why can't I figure this out?" "This was a dumb idea!"
  
• Advice not working:  Suggestions from family/friends isn't helping
  
• Independence: "I should be able to fix this on my own."
  
• Justification:  "I must not be meant to do this."

Hiring a life or business coach is an important decision.  This relationship may be one of the most powerful relationships of your entire life. Knowing what to look for and what's available to you is integral to consider in your search.  Below are 6 considerations when searching for a life or business coach.

Some clients feel more comfortable if they already know their coach first.  They don't want to spend time building trust.  However, some clients like the anonymity and confidentiality that is prevalent when you don't know your coach.  These clients feel freer when they don't have to worry about the relationship outside the coaching.  For others, they feel freer when they know the person.  It all depends on which choice will enable you to be most like yourself.  

Are you good at accomplishing some goals, but not others?  To high-achievers who normally get things done this can be very frustrating.  Usually the first or only thing you in response to this non-action is spend oodles of time  analyzing why this is happening--most likely never coming up with an answer.  You wonder if you are doing something wrong or maybe you aren't supposed to be attempting it to begin with.  Or, even worse, you wonder if something is wrong with you.

Here's another idea, could it be your saboteur is running the show?  

1. "I know what I want, but I can't figure out what's getting in my way or how to get back on track."
   
2. "I'm unorganized, so I don't think I would be a good business person."
   
3. "I have several great business ideas, but I lose steam a few days later."
4. "It's imperative that I spend a certain amount of time each day being creative, but I keep getting distracted."
   
5. "I start doing something to change, but then I lose motivation.  I want to stay focused to achieve my goals."
6. "I want to be less stressed."
7. "I'm feeling drawn to help out in some way, but it just seems overwhelming to me and I'm already very busy."
8. "I want more balance in my life between career/family/fun."
   
9. "I get stressed by customer calls and fly off the handle."
10. "My employer keeps asking me to do more and more, but I'm feeling overwhelmed."

People hear about life or business coaching and don't know how it will help them or even if they are candidates for coaching.  Getting started and determining a topic can be stressful.  Recently, a client asked me, "Do you have some kind of list of topics that will give me and idea of what to talk about?" 

To help your prepare for a life or business coaching session, take a look a the list below.  Do any of these thoughts go through your mind?     

What is Life Coaching?

I'm often asked the question, What is Life Coaching?  Life Coaching is the latest buzzword in the world of self-help.  But as with most buzzwords, a lot of people aren't exactly sure what it truly means.  I've heard reservations ranging from "Am I going to be psychoanalyzed and on a couch crying my eyes out and then go home feeling nothing really changed?  to "Are you going to fix me?"  OR "If I get coaching, I must really be in a bad space."  But, none of this is true. A good life coach doesn't fix you.  Life Coaching is so much more than just listening to your problems and then sending you on your way still stuck.

Most of us stay in our comfort zones.  It's how we avoid feeling uncomfortable and anxious.  But really, staying in our comfort zone allows us to avoid pain, such as the pain of being rejected or looking stupid to others.  Avoiding pain is ingrained in all of us to varying degrees.  It's become such a habit that we don't even realize we are doing it.  Unfortunately, the avoidance of pain directly results in sabotaging what we really want out of life.